Detox done and dusted

Ok so detox went fine. I must admit I only did it for 6 days instead of 7 but I had really bad dirrahea and didn't really want to do another day. I had no cravings whilst on it and didn't feel particularly hungry so that was good.

On another note for the first time in my life I am not missing the gym at all. This is really odd as this is the longest I haven't exercised for. Now I know before I had this surgery I was getting really bored of the gym and at the moment I have no desire to go back. I do have another 4 weeks anyway before I am allowed to exercise but it has got me thinking about what I really want and how I want to go about it. For some reason my body actually looks better since I haven't been to the gym than when I have been working out really hard so I am not sure why. So this has got me thinking of maybe taking a gentler approach to exercise, maybe incorporating some pilates with some weights and cardio. My legs actually look smaller which i am happy about, they just need to be tighter so maybe I am working too hard at the gym. Who knows, all I know is all the effort I put in seems to not be paying off, I why be so obsessive about my diet when at the end of the day I am not even competing? You know what my goals truly are now, to have a fit and functional body. Sure I want to be lean and toned but you know what, I don't really care about how much muscle I have. Going back a couple of months ago, yeah I wanted to build muscle but I am sick and tired of just trying too hard. So I think I am going to slow down a little and just mix things up a little. I have 2 little kids to look after on very little sleep and the last thing I want to do really is kill myself at the gym, and this is how I feel.

My membership is up for renewal at the end of December and I will probably re-new but to be honest I am so tempted just to work out at home as I do have a gym set-up but I think I know deep down this may not work for me as I do believe I need to get away from the house to get the motivation and peace and quiet to work out. The other option was to do pilates and join the pilates studio as a member and then possibly do 2 weights workouts a week at home, although this is a more expensive option than the gym.

I AM SO CONFUSED!!!!